Sunday, March 16, 2008

Stressed and feeling all low since yesterday

ARGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

sigh......why in the world does these feelings come to me.....

only person to blame is myself, for letting myself be like this.

huuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu haaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa

Monday, March 10, 2008

Sleeping my life away

For months now, I have been unable to wake up at a time I wanted to, unless I am particularly forced to (like an appointment or such), but even so, I still get up at the nick of time. What exactly causes this? Would it be caused by the fact that I do not have to wake up everyday? Coz I have nothing to do?

Well, I do get up at pre-determined times like....6am to off the aircond...or at 7 plus to do something that I look forward to everyday. After that......somehow, I just drop dead back to bed. Do I lack the will-power to get myself out of bed? I guess so....I think I lack the will-power to do anything :S what is happening to me!!!! gosh, I better snap out of this soon.... Actually, for a situation like this, all that is needed is the will-power to just snap out of the situation and move along. Easier said than done....as I found out first hand. Oh well, another day has passed, and I failed to make full use of it again. Let's just see what happens tomorrow :)

"When all you got to keep is strong, move along move along, like I know you do.
And even when your hope is gone, move along move along, just to make it through"
-All American Rejects-

How to differentiate male/female dogs

Ok, this I have to write hahhahaa. It was after dinner, I was in the car with my cousins and granma while mom went to the bank, and we were facing this divider on the road, which sorts of looks like an island? Whatever that is....anyways on the "island" there were these dogs....one whole group of them, like....say 8? So it goes, when my 9yr-old cousin asked his sister, "Sis, do u know how to differentiate the dogs between girl and guy?" (for those who intend to correct the english...dun bother). The sister of course lazily say no she doesn't know. He then with his smarty pants looks, answered this.....

"Well, the boy dogs all got one kukuciao, while the girl dogs hoh, all got a lot of kukuciaos one. All the kukuciaos for the baby to drink milk"

At which I had to hold myself and stop from bursting out of laughter *LOL* Gosh, the incredible minds of kids.....*faint* Perhaps next time, when we do see a female dog, kukuciaoS comes into mind? :P

Bonus Question : Spot the kukuciaos *rofl*

The START....of enlightenment??

Now, it's about time I started a blog, although I'm not exactly the kind to write one, but then again, I have too much time on my hands.... (due to the lack of directions in life :S ) I know....I know....sad case right..... Anyway, I don't exactly know what to post on this, but I guess, anything will do.

If you're wondering what's happening to my life, I myself don't know ahhahaha. Well, looking at it objectively, nothing is really happening hahahhaha. No job, no nothing but I'm still glad for the people around me, especially microbe (yes I name my friends uniquely) , family and friends.


Ok, enough for the boring stuffs, the start of enlightenment, for those who don't know me yet... This is me.....


somehow I'm never known as a good boy :P that image somehow never stick to me ever.... Put in "budak jahat" and it somehow fits me perfectly..... even my best friends cant imagine of me being angelic.... most of them get heart attack when I "try" to be good :P hence the start of enlightenment would be the path of improving myself in every aspect, and I think my blogs will be based on that.

I wonder if some of you might have this sort of problem I'm having. Which is being depressed for no particular reason. After a few weeks of analyzing this, it is deduced that I think too much into things, for which I do not always do, and being jobless aint helping the situation either. It's quite ridiculous living out my days like that, but getting out of it doesn't seem as easy as well. Luckily for me, I have people to help pull me out of this situation, but of course I could not depend on them forever, else I'll just be stuck in this till....the end of me. It still comes and go at times...like today :S The point here is...mind control...is it really possible to control your thoughts?? Or is keeping yourself busy (hence not able to think of it) the only way out?? How long can you ever keep yourself busy anyways? Especially with no direction in whatsoever things.

As for me at the moment, keeping myself positive, and keeping myself busy seems to be the only remedy but I just don't think I can keep it up forever. Weeks seem like months, and days seem like weeks. One bad trait that I have, is that I seem to try to sleep off my depression, which unfortunately only leaves me in a more depressed mode hahahaha. This condition has had me reeling from frustration and the reality that things do not always go well. And the reality that everyone falls at times....mid-life crisis? hahahhaha wakaranai